|Words:Chinese Proverb Art:Beatriz Milhazes|
In this day and age people utilize social media to either create the illusion that they are content and perfect or to try and make people jealous of themselves. We post only the good.
Being a photojournalist (that's what I like to call myself), I have to admit that I only like to post photos that are beautiful and happy. I do get the appeal. I only want to share beauty in the world. There is enough hostility and ugliness. However I do not post things to prove to myself or others that my life is amazing. I post happy photos because that is exactly how I felt in that moment. I like to scroll through my own instagram from time to time and I cant help but feel proud. Proud of the things I post, proud of the photos I take, proud of the moments I have, proud of the life I have created for myself and my boys. It may not be subtle, but I do post unhappy things too. No matter how far I have come from my depression/bipolar, I do have my moments of sadness and loneliness. In those moments I mostly post quotes or songs.
My life is pretty close to perfect right now. There are a few things that need to evolve but overall I am happy. I am proud of the life I live. I am proud not because it is perfect, but proud because I take small steps everyday to improve my life just a little bit more. I don't think I am better than anyone else or that I have all the right answers and all the right methods. Everyone has to live their own life the way they want to. It's their own right. But i'll be dammed if I am going to be resented for the way I live mine and the way I express my happiness. Social media is my outlet of self expression. If you are going to roll your eyes at my posts then why have me at all? I get the whole saying: "Don't worry about people talking about you behind your back, when they stop talking about you it means you are irrelevant" but I rather not be in people's negative thoughts in the first place. I have realized to let go of things that are out of my control ... including things like this. I just wish everyone was more positive and more concerned with their own lives. The world would really be a much better place. But I guess it would also be a little boring.
I am very pleased with how my life is going. I am happy because even though I am not where I want to be, I still make the best of what I have while making strides on improving myself. Because without self improvement there is no growth, without growth then we are going nowhere.I don't know about ya'll but I have places to go.